10 Ways to Be Kind to Yourself after a Stressful Day

Whether it’s a demanding boss, a looming deadline, a big presentation, or a challenging client, stressful days happen. 

In the midst of a total burnout, I left the office stressed to the max every day and learned the hard way that the worst thing you can do is to take it home with you. 

Stress is like a black mold; it’ll spread to every aspect of your life if you let it.  Stress nearly destroyed my relationship; my husband hated coming home to me and worked late so he didn’t have to.  It devastated my health.  I put on weight and was embarrassed by my body.  I used alcohol as an escape instead of dealing with my problems.  I used caffeine to fight the fatigue I felt all day, but that just kept me up all night.

It took me years to fix what chronic stress did to my life.

Let’s be honest: no matter how positive or present you are, stress is sometimes unavoidable.  Fortunately, it is possible to leave a stressful day at the door.  Use a bad day as a catalyst to be kind to yourself.These ten tips for self-care offer simple ways to flip the stress switch off. 

1. Practice Gratitude

First things first: flipping the stress switch off starts with a mindset shift.  It can be easy to focus on the things that went wrong.  Shift your perspective by spending a few minutes being grateful for the good things that happened during the day. 

2. Get Moving

Exercise has been shown to alleviate stress by releasing mood-boosting endorphins, but that doesn’t mean you have to spend hours at the gym after a long day.  Go for a quick walk around your neighborhood, string together a series of sun salutations, or throw an impromptu dance party in your living room.

3. Take a Shot

A wheatgrass shot, that is.  Stress – even acute stress – can create an acidic pH in the body, which leads to insomnia, fatigue, nervousness and anxiety.  To fight the acidity, take a shot of wheatgrass.  Not only is wheatgrass alkalizing to the body, its full of vitamins and minerals that help fight free radicals, it detoxifies the liver and blood stream, and it promotes healing of cells in the body.  Grab a shot at a local juice bar on the way home or keep powdered wheat grass on hand for easy access.

4. Order Take-out

What?  A health coach encouraging you to order take out?  Look- you’ve had a long day… the last thing you need is adding the stress of cooking and cleaning to the mix.  Just stick with real, whole foods – like a yummy seasonal salad (dressing on the side), vegetable curry, a burrito (hold the cheese and sour cream), or steamed veggies with rice. 

5. Enjoy a Glass of Wine

Alcohol is naturally soothing and can help you sleep.  Wine, especially red wine, has added health benefits of reducing your risk of heart attack, heart disease, stroke, cancer, cataracts, and type II diabetes, promoting brain health, and helping you live longer.  But, take everything in moderation – enjoy a single glass of wine at dinner.

6. Have a Treat

Sugary treats will only leave you feeling worse in the long term, but if you want a little after dinner treat, nibble on a piece of antioxidant rich dark chocolate.  Look for something with a high cacao content (70% or higher) to fight free radicals and oxidative stress. 

7. Unplug Before Bed

Stress often leaves us “tired but wired” – zapped of energy, but unable to sleep.  Add artificial light from TV and computer screens to the mix and the problem only gets worse; screen lights impact melatonin production and throw off circadian rhythms, preventing deep, restorative sleep. To ensure a good night’s rest, spend at least 1 hour before bed unplugged.

8. Sweat It Out

Stress can be toxic, but a 20-minute detox bath can be enough to start cleansing the body.  Add 5-10 drops of your favorite essential oil, 2 cups of Epsom salts, and 1 cup of baking soda to a hot bath (you want it hot enough to make you to sweat!).

9. Do An Inversion

Spending a few minutes in shoulder stand or with legs up the wall can do wonders for releasing stress.  Not only do inversions offer a change in perspective, they also reverse the effects of gravity on your body by improving circulation and lymph flow and bringing blood and oxygen to the brain.

10. Set an Intention

Don’t let a stressful day set the tone of the rest of your week.  Consciously set an intention that will create ease and grace in your life tomorrow and every day after.

12 Kitchen Staples for Healthy Eating in a Crunch

I’m freaking busy… in a totally awesome, but still crazy kinda way.  So, cooking complex, extravagant meals just isn’t in the cards for me.

I’m guessing it’s not in the cards for you, too?

The good news is that eating healthy, flavorful, delicious meals doesn’t have to be complicated.  I get by with very little in my kitchen (a necessity with my apartment size fridge and freezer and lack of cabinetry).  Here’s the 12 things I absolutely can’t live without in my kitchen (and some quick healthy eating tips on how I use them!).  

1. Himalayan Sea Salt

Not all salt is created equal!  Himalayan sea salt is the most natural form of salt available and has 84 minerals that your body needs that you just don’t get in table salt. 

2. Healthy Oils

I always have coconut and extra virgin olive oil on hand – I use coconut oil for any high heat cooking and EVOO to dress cooked veggies or for salads… but my new OBSESSION is avocado oil.  It is super mild in flavor so I find it way more versatile than coconut oil, which can unintentionally leave dishes feeling “Thai-inspired”. 

3. Dijon Mustard

I used to laugh at the Grey Poupon commercial growing up… “Excuse me, do you have any Grey Poupon?”  It was absurd and ridiculous.  Well, now that’s me.  I slather this stuff on EVERYTHING: fish, veggie burgers, shrimp, and I’ve even mixed it into egg and tuna salad for a little kick.  Best part: it’s a totally guilt free indulgence!

4. Shakeology

My secret weapon!  After just 4 days of adding Shakeology to my diet, I said goodbye to my daily afternoon 3 pm crash forever.  Packed with 70 superfoods, antioxidants, prebiotics, probiotics, and adaptogens, Shakeology is the perfect addition to my morning smoothie.

5. Frozen Burger Patties (turkey, salmon, and veggie)

These are a LIFESAVER.  The best part: no defrosting required.  Just throw them on the stove frozen and they’ll cook up just fine.  I buy all three in bulk from Costco to save time and money – plus, I legit eat burger patties (no bun!) 2-3 nights a week, so I need them in quantity.

6. Eggs

I love eggs!  I eat 2 scrambled eggs for lunch several times a week.  Eggs are so versatile, they’re easy to keep fresh – I mix them with kimchi, any number of veggies, tomato sauce, horseradish, you name it!

7. Quinoa

Quinoa is super simple to make and can be dressed up or down based on your preference.  I usually throw in a tablespoon of coconut oil to enrich the nutty flavor and stir in some veggies to create some variety in the texture.  Check out my 1 pot quinoa dinner here.

8. Pre-Washed Organic Greens (mixed or spinach)

There’s nothing simpler than these – I use them as a base for salads, for sautéing (spinach only) and in my morning smoothies.  To keep them fresh longer, check out this quick tip:

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9. Frozen Organic Steam-in-Bag Veggies

These are a GODSEND.  Plain, pre-chopped, pre-cleaned veggies that I can cook without dirtying a dish in 6 minutes flat?  Yes, please!  If you’re worried about the plastic, please know that “these are special bags specifically designed for microwave cooking. They are 100% microwave oven safe and are specially designed from plastics meeting FDA regulations and do not contain PVC, Phthalate, BPA, PFOA or melamine”.  (Source: Birds Eye Foods)  And, of course, if you’re weary of the bags, don’t use them, but DON’T SKIP YOUR VEGGIES, either!

10. Mixed, Unsalted Nuts

These are my favorite grab and go snack!  And did you know, a handful of nuts a day has been linked to a longer life.  Century club here I come!

11. Sweet potatoes

When I’m craving something sweet but want to avoid snacking, sweet potatoes are the perfect fix.  I pop them in the microwave and top with peanut butter, pumpkin pie spice, or a sprinkling of blue cheese and walnuts. 

12. Seltzer

I love water, but it can get plain-old boring sometimes.  Lately, I’ve been obsessed with adding seltzer to the mix and I’ve recently been experimenting with some fun mocktails.  My fav so far?  Cucumber and dill!

That’s my must-have list.  What’s on yours?

5 Foods You Should Be Eating to Ooze Confidence

You know that food can affect your waistline, but did you know it can have an impact on your confidence, too? 

If you’re feeling low after living on the corporate un-wellness diet, try these 5 foods for confidence instead of your workday staples to start looking and FEELING your best:

1. Eat Kale Salad, Not Pizza

Leaving another lunch meeting stuffed with pizza, feeling bloated and ready for a nap?  Next time, try a kale salad (or other dark, leafy green) instead.  Amongst their many health benefits, dark, leafy greens like kale are high in folate which contributes to the production of serotonin and leaves you feeling cool, calm, and collected.   Kale is also rich in calcium, making a cheesy pizza slice totally unnecessary.  Plus, since dairy causes breakouts in most women, subbing in leafy greens will leave your skin looking amazing.

2. Eat Strawberries, Not Gummy Vitamins

Strawberries are rich in Vitamin C, a surprising mood booster.  Vitamin C helps fight off fatigue and depression and strawberries give you the added bonus of being a low glycemic fruit, so they won’t set you off on the sugar spike and crash cycle.

3. Drink Green Tea, Not a Skinny Vanilla Latte

Green tea is full of antioxidants, naturally low in caffeine, and super hydrating.  Add a few drops of local honey or stevia to sweeten it, as green tea on its own can have a bitter taste.  While coffee also contains antioxidants, the caffeine and sugar are a no-no, especially in the afternoon, if you want to ensure a good night’s sleep.

4. Eat Salmon, Not Chicken Fingers

DHA – an omega-3 fatty acid found in fatty fish has been shown to elevate mood and is anti-inflammatory, as opposed to deep fried chicken fingers which can increase inflammation in the body, leaving you feeling less than your best.

5. Eat Dark Chocolate, Not a Snickers

Hungry, why wait?  Because eating a Snickers will just leave you crashing in an hour anyway.  If you’re looking for a choco-fix, enjoy a small piece of high quality dark chocolate (70% cacao or higher).  Dark chocolate is full of antioxidants that help fight chronic fatigue and oxidative stress in the body.  

Chia Seeds Are Blowing Up

Literally – these little suckers expand like nobody’s business. They’ve even been featured recently in the New York Times... the true measure of whether or not a seed has ‘made it’. 

So what’s up with their explosion on the health food scene?  Here’s a crash course on why these little powerhouses are good for you (+ my favorite chia seed recipe).

1. Oodles of Fiber

These incredible ‘super seeds’ contain 11 grams of fiber per ounce (2 tablespoons) – which is 42% of your recommended daily value of fiber in a single serving.  

Bonus tip: Since fiber slows digestion and makes you feel fuller by soaking up fluid and expanding in your digestive tract, it can be a great way to start your day, especially if you’re trying to lose weight! 

2. Rich in Omegas

Omega 3 and Omega 6 fatty acids are essential and most of us are not getting enough of them.   Chia seeds give you a boost of both.

Bonus tip: Omegas can also help you clear away that nasty brain fog that sets in every afternoon.  Add 2 tablespoons of chia seeds to a glass of water to get your fill.

 3. Healthy Fats

We’ve been down this road together before, but let’s go there again.  Fats are absolutely necessary in a healthy diet.  Chia seeds pack 9 grams of fat per ounce, which can be as much 15-20% of your daily required value.

Bonus tip:  If you want to get the skinny on fats, check out What’s Fat Got To Do With It from the archives.

4. Fill’er Up

Have you ever had a chia pet?  You know how it plumps right up when you add water?  That’s all because of the chia seeds.   When mixed with water, chia forms a gel. Why do you care?  Research suggests:

When this happens in your stomach, the gel may keep you feeling fuller longer.

The gel acts as a natural detoxifier, by grabbing and flushing out toxins in your system.

Bonus tip: The chia gel also allows you to make a super healthy & yummy dessert that satisfies in under 2 minutes prep time.

Chai Chia Seed Pudding

chia seed pudding

Prep Time: 2 minutes Wait Time: 2 hours Serves: 2-4 people

1 cup cooled decaf Chai tea (brewed strong) (sub: ½ cup Vanilla Unsweetened Almond Milk for a creamier texture) ½ cup chia seeds 1.5-2 teaspoons maple syrup (to taste) 1 teaspoon vanilla extract Dash Himalayan sea salt (to taste) 1 cup of your favorite fruits and nuts (optional).  I like: -Mixed berries & pistachios -Diced pears & cashews -Mashed banana & peanuts

Mix chai, chia seeds, 1.5 teaspoons maple syrup, and vanilla and refrigerate for 1 hour.  At 1 hour mark, stir the mixture and add in any additional maple syrup (taste first).  Refrigerate an additional 1 hr+, top with sea salt, fruits and nuts & enjoy!

Is it OK to be lazy?

As a culture, we’re a bunch of overachievers.  We make things happen... and we make things happen fast.  There’s lots of going, doing, being and more, more, MORE.There’s not a whole lot of lazy.

As a go-getter, being lazy is something I struggle with a lot.  Being lazy feels...well... lazy.  It feels bad.  I feel like I should ALWAYS be doing something. 

I often ask myself: Is it OK to be lazy?

Lazy can be great and healthy and goal-affirming if it’s done correctly.

When I was totally burnt out from my job in consulting, I’d spend entire weekends immobilized on my couch because I was too mentally and physically exhausted to do anything else.  This is the BAD side of lazy.  There’s no joy in that.

So, what’s the difference between good lazy and bad lazy?

Good lazy is done with intention.  It’s taking a leisurely walk.  Savoring coffee with a friend.  A well thought out movie marathon.  Spending an afternoon reading a good book.

is it okay to be lazy

Bad lazy is done out of helplessness and exhaustion. When your head is telling you that you need to be doing something productive, but your heart is telling you to chill the f out, that’s bad lazy.   The argument between the head and the heart actually leads to more stress.  And nobody needs that.

Bad lazy is non-stop bad reality TV benders.  It’s getting lost down the Buzzfeed rabbit hole.  It’s ordering takeout for 5 days in a row because your kitchen’s a mess and you don’t want to clean it.

So, how do we do more good and less bad lazy?

Remember, the distinction is all about INTENTION.  First, give yourself the permission to be lazy.  Then, use this handy fill-in-the-blank affirmation:

Today, I am going to fully enjoy   ________________________ because it makes me feel _________________________________  (think: at ease, joyful, relaxed, etc.). 

Declare it out loud – hearing your own voice say it will be affirming and will make it more real for you.

Are you like me – is lazy sometimes a struggle?  Share your thoughts on being lazy in the comments.

The 5 Minute Energy Boost You Can Do Anywhere

Feeling the need for an afternoon nap but totally slammed with work?  Don’t stress (or go running to your nearest Starbucks).  This super effective energy boosting breathing exercise mimics cardiovascular exercise and gets your blood pumping in no time – no caffeine or sugar rush necessary.

The best part?  You can do this ANYWHERE.  In a meeting, on the bus, at your desk, in line at the grocery store**.  Just follow these simple steps:

1. Start by finding a comfortable seat and closing your eyes (if possible)
2. Place one or both hands on your stomach
3. Take 3 large “belly breaths” – your belly should push out slightly on the inhale, you can crunch your abs in on the exhale
4. On the 3rd breath, hold your inhale as long as possible.
5. Keep holding your inhale.
6. When you think you can’t hold it anymore, hold it for 10 more seconds.
7. Exhale
8. Take a belly breath; this time hold your exhale (i.e. keep your lungs empty)
9. Repeat this process for 2-3 minutes  (approximately 2-3 rounds of inhale/exhale holding)
10. Take 10 regular deep belly breaths
11. Slowly open your eyes (if closed)
12. Gently “shake it out” – roll your head side to side, shake out your arms, release your shoulders down, kick your legs (do this discreetly if you’re in a public place!)
13. Finish by drinking at least 8 ounces of water immediately after

**I recommend trying this energy boosting breathing exercise a few times in a private space, as it is common to feel lightheaded when first practicing.  Once your body gets used to the exercise, you can experiment with taking this baby public.

In the comments, tell me what you think.  Do you like this energy boosting breathing exercise?  How do you feel afterwards?